One Month!

Fiona is one month old today!

There's two more pounds and another inch-and-a-half of her to love.  I would say, "that was fast," but this past month has been a bit of a timeless blur.  I've told people that our weird sleep patterns have an effect really similar to jet lag, and Tori describes it like Groundhog Day.

Fiona is a little less hairy than the groundhog; Tori is a little more so than Bill Murray.  The idea is the same.

One thing I've learned about having a baby is that people stop saying hello to you.

"Baby!"
"Oh, Fiona's here!"
"Look at her!"

These are some examples of the words that have replaced more traditional greetings, such as "hi."

On the whole, though, I really like parenthood so far.  It's still bizarre that we are responsible for a little human life, but that task is kind of easy, really.  For those of you who, like me before Labor Day, had no real experience with tiny babies, let me clear things up for you.  If an infant needs something, it will come from this list:

-Sleep

-Food

-Clean clothes/diaper

The end.  Oh, and they can't hold their heads up, so you have to do that.  But really, that's all.  Can't go anywhere, can't mess with stuff, can't backtalk, they sleep 18+ hours a day, and don't even eat real food.  Give them a bath every couple of days.  There, that's my lesson on the first month.

Up until the last few days, she pretty much did not cry unless the above list was out of balance.  Now she's a bit testy...I think sometimes babies just get pissed off, like other people.

Tori and I can watch her make awesomely grotesque faces when she wakes up, make endless commentary about her gigantic farts, narrate what we assume to be her inner monologue, and mimic her weird hand positions for hours.  And we fully realize that you, dear reader, don't give a crap about any of it, so we try our best not to fill conversations with descriptions of those mundane joys of our life.  Those are joys that are relevant ONLY to the parents of a given kid.  I might make a weird face montage one day and post it on here to embarrass her later in life and to entertain you, but only if it's actually funny.

                  

Really cute, but not funny. You don't care about the caption I might invent for this, and you don't need to see the seven other pictures taken within 2 minutes of this one.

It's awesome watching Tori being a great mom.  She's a real pro.  Being a father has changed me, I know, but I want to take a little more time to reflect on that, and it'll be the subject of another post.